Express to her your hurt feelings, but don’t tell her she can’t spend Thanksgiving with her boyfriend.
Consider even extending an invitation to him to join all of you in New York (which he will decline, of course), if only to show that YOU have made an effort and that this isn’t about your keeping her from her boyfriend as much as it is about making it easier for her to be with him AND you on Thanksgiving.
Of course, you DO want to keep her away from her boyfriend. Unfortunately, short of keeping your daughter locked in a room in your house, there’s not much you can do to keep her from seeing him.
There’s not much you can do to lessen the grip he seems to have on her.
He comes from an extremely religious and controlling family whose children were home-schooled, and now his two oldest sisters are married and live in homes on the family property.The good news here is that your daughter is only 20 years old — an age when people make a lot of stupid mistakes they learn from.She still has plenty of time to explore this relationship and come to her senses before being brainwashed by her boyfriend and his religion.His family lives fifteen minutes away from our house and all of his relatives live locally as well.My daughter and boyfriend go to the same college and see each other all of the time.